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I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so
much, and I have never figured out the whole venus and Mars thing.
I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their
heart.
FOR EXAMPLE:
One evening last week, my missus and I were getting into bed while the passion
starts to heat up, and she eventually says
"I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me." I said "WHAT?????!!! what
was that ?!" so she says the words every fella on the planet dreads to hear
"You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to
satisfy your physical needs as a man"
She responded to my puzzled look by saying "cant you just love me for who I am
and not for what I do for you in the bedroom?"
Realising that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.
The very next day I opted to take the day off work to spend time with her. We
went out for a nice lunch and then went shopping to a big department store.
I walked round with her while she tried on several different very expensive
outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take so I told her we'll just buy them
all.
She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes so I said "let’s get a pair
for each new outfit." We went on to the jewellery department where she picked
out a pair of diamond earrings.
Let me tell you....she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave
short of a shipwreck.
I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet
when she doesn't even know how to play tennis.
I think I threw her a loop when I said "that’s fine honey."
She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all the excitement. Smiling with
excited anticipation she finally said "I think this is
all dear, let’s go to the cashier." I could hardly contain myself when I blurted
out "No honey, I don't feel like it."
Her face went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled"
WHAT?????!!!!!" I then said " really honey! I just want you to hold this stuff
for a while.
You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to
satisfy your shopping needs as a woman."
Just when she had this look of wanting to kill me I added "Why can’t you just
love me for who I am and not just for the things I can buy you?"
Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either.....
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